Short Story Book Club: Say Yes
By Kristen on Jul 1, 2008 in short story book club
photo credit: Unhindered by Talent
Hello everyone! Thank you so much for your interest in this new endeavor! I hope everyone found Say Yes thought-provoking and discussion-worthy 
Here are my initial questions to get the discussion started:
Normally when we read a story, we tend to feel closest to and empathize with the narrator (since we witness the events as the narrator does).
In what ways DID you empathize with the husband?
In what respects did you find yourself aligning with the wife?
Who do you think Wolff wanted us to like the most and why?
I’ll add another question in a bit… And feel free to ask your own questions!
Simply leave a comment below with your thoughts, and please do not feel constrained by my questions –Share any impressions!
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Hi all! I’m going to jump in with why I chose this story…
I really like how the more unsympathetic character (the husband) is the one whose thoughts and perspective we are privy to (even though the narration is 3rd person, it’s limited to HIS perspective). I also love how the external action mirrors his internal struggle — the dish water, the cut finger, the fighting dogs, the darkness at the end. I think short stories can do this so well due to their brevity.
On a personal note — the first time I read this, I was shocked that a married couple wouldn’t already know the answer to her question! Maybe that’s because I married later in life at 35?
Kristen | Jul 1, 2008 | Reply
ok I’m a little late in reading this – and I admit… I don’t get it *confused*
Mrs S | Blue Archipelago | Jul 5, 2008 | Reply
I think my interpretation is that since these two hadn’t discussed this topic — whether or not race is a crucial feature of a person — the wife therefore felt like her husband was a stranger?
And I think she tried to prove her point that race is only “skin deep” by turning off the lights at the end — i.e., she’s the same person whether her husband could she the color of her skin or not?
Kristen | Jul 5, 2008 | Reply
Yeah that came across I suppose – but it just seemed like an odd thing to be arguing about… I think that short stories may be as alien to me as poetry *lol* I’ll try again next month
Mrs S | Blue Archipelago | Jul 6, 2008 | Reply
Sorry I’m a little late on this. I enjoyed the story, but I’m not sure how much I “got.”
I’m going to address your second question: I’m not excusing the husband’s mentality, but I did find myself empathizing with the husband a little. In a way, he reminded me of my grandfathers — they almost don’t know any better about people who are different from them. In addition, I think he really felt that he was a “good” husband — attentive, helpful, considerate, etc. — in those things that he put importance on (he even mentions that none of this will matter in another 30 years when they were dead.) I also feel as if the wife was baiting him in a way. There were quite a few times that she could have let it go, and she kept attacking him. I sincerely doubt that she thought she could change his mind, yet she still kept pushing him to admit he wouldn’t have married her. I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m on the side of the husband — I just think he might not have been capable of what his wife wanted from him.
Julie P. | Jul 8, 2008 | Reply
Thanks, Julie! I think you really identified why I find this story interesting — I, too, empathize with the husband even though I disagree with his answer. You can’t help but feel a little sorry for him — and wish that they had covered this topic when they were getting to know each other before they got married. I love how you point out that he may not be capable of what his wife is demanding from him…
Kristen | Jul 8, 2008 | Reply
Geez, Kristen, what a tight, beautifully written story to kick off the short story book club! I read it and immediately had someone else read it just so I could have them feel the impact of it.
On to the questions…Like the other people who commented, I kind of felt sorry for the husband because he is who he is, so to speak: it’s not like he’s pulling anything surprising, and it’s not as though he’s a cruel person. He feels the common feeling of the status quo: if I keep to myself within the safe limits of my beliefs and my society, then I am a good person.
His wife knows this, I am convinced. And through years has probably tolerated it, possibly even been comforted by it. But for whatever reason: boredom, crabbiness, feeling quarrelsome; she hits upon something that she can self-righteously hate him for: not having love overcome all other barriers.
The thing is, he’s not exactly innocent. He’s so smug, so self-congratulatory about what a Good Husband he is. Maybe that’s what his wife is sick and tired of. Shouldn’t he be doing all of those things, without believing that he’s going above and beyond? She’s saying “how truly good are you?” In the end, I like to think she’s leaving him, but maybe she’s just moving to the coach. Whatever it is, she does become a stranger, and who knows for how long?
It just reminds me of something my father used to say about ignorance and evil looking a lot alike.
Anna | Jul 9, 2008 | Reply
Anna — I love how you picked up on the tone! He is self-congratulatory and for doing basic domestic things that should be expected in any partnership. I love how the issue is not whether or not he’s a good husband (which is the issue he wants to focus on), but rather whether or not he’s a good person!
I think you are right that we get the feeling the wife has been fed up for a while — in other words, she does not give him the benefit of the doubt — which he seems to think he deserves.
Great contributions, Anna! Thank you!
Kristen | Jul 10, 2008 | Reply
I want there to be a better way to have this book club discussion! I really loved this short story and I’m so excited to read more of them, but I feel like this is too clunky of a way to do it-what about a wiki or something?
Anna | Jul 10, 2008 | Reply
I agree — I just downloaded the “subscribe to comments” plug-in to help facilitate discussion a little, but I think you are right on w/ the wiki idea. However, I have no idea how to implement one… I will put it on my “to do” list when I get back from Iowa/Duluth next week. Good idea!!
Kristen | Jul 11, 2008 | Reply
Just ran across you site. Will get on with “Say Yes” and work to get this in my weekly routine.
Red Reader | Jul 26, 2008 | Reply
Welcome!! I’m glad you found me! I’m working on a way to make Tiny Tales better through the use of a wiki, too, so I’ll keep you updated.
Thanks for reading!
Kristen | Jul 27, 2008 | Reply
I kept waiting for the husband to say something like: Dear, if I was black and years ago when we fell in love and I ask you to marry me, would you have said YES?” At the same time I wanted to substitue in the story “Jewish” or autistic in place of Black to see if that altered the story–argument–line any.
To speak to or for someone can be done, to speak as someone can never be done. We can never be in the place of the other, you wonder what the wife’s problem is: why now does she even ask herself such a question–would he still love me if I was different than I am. Perhaps she is the one with the troubles about acceptance, love and marriage.
Red Reader | Aug 3, 2008 | Reply
Really interesting!! Seriously, it seems as if the wife has some acceptance issues, too, doesn’t it?! I would think she would know what her husband’s answer would be based on other decisions, etc…, too?!
I’m so glad you’ve joined the discussion!!
Kristen | Aug 7, 2008 | Reply
Thanks Kristen for that story. “Say Yes” certainly does seem interesting! I will get you some questions as soon as I mull the story over.
Short Stories | May 12, 2010 | Reply