Love the One You’re With by Emily Giffin
Release date: 2008 / 5 hours (CD — abridged)
Synopsis (from back cover): Ellen’s relationship with Andy doesn’t just seem perfect on the surface, it really is perfect. She loves his family, and everything about him, including that he brings out the best in her. That is, until Ellen unexpectedly runs into Leo: the one who got away, the one who brought out the worst in her, the one she can’t forget. This is the story about why we choose to love the ones we love, and why we just can’t forget the ones who aren’t right for us.
Review: So, a month or so ago I read somewhere that Giffin’s recent novel was out, requested it on CD on the library to keep me company on my daily hour commute and then, 30 minutes in, remembered that I always swear I will NEVER read another novel by Giffin. Which is what I say every time I read one of her novels (with the exception of Baby Proof — kind of liked that one…).
Giffin’s protagonists are so unlikeable, so unsympathetic, so darn annoying — how do I forget this? The first novel I read by Giffin involved a maid of honor sleeping with the groom… nice. Should’ve learned my lesson. This novel is exactly what the synopsis implies (except I did not find any sort of redeeming message to take away) — so if that sounds good to you, give it a go.
I was so irritated that the protagonist was willing, even eager, to throw away a really healthy, happy, loving life due to a chance encounter with an ex-boyfriend who was terrible for her, thus confirming the stereotype that women self-destructively go for “bad boys” and cannot learn from their past mistakes. Grrr…
Anyway — if you have read and reviewed this, please leave a comment or a link — especially if you enjoyed it so that I can provide my readers with a more balanced view… and please keep me from reading her next novel…
I thought Ellen’s point (paraphrased) about how maybe she didn’t recognize the depth of her feeling for Andy because their relationship was too easy was a good one, and rather true to life. Romances tend to reinforce the choice of the difficult “bad boy” over the safe, nice guy as being correct, and, well, romantic. Love isn’t real, or isn’t as intense, unless you suffer for it. So in some ways I thought Love the One You’re With was an anti-romance, though it was romantic.
Great comment, Jaison — Thank you for forcing me to re-evaluate my opinion! Interestingly, isn’t love easier when you’re actually compatible with the other person? I like the thought of it as an “anti-romance”…
What a coincidence – I just reviewed this book yesterday myself and I felt the exact same way, though you conveyed your thoughts much better than I did! I’ll be linking to your post for sure.
here was mine:
http://ismellbooks.blogspot.com/2008/09/love-one-youre-with-by-emily-giffin.html
Thanks!
Kim
I didn’t care for this book, either. Though I could relate to Ellen’s predicament, I found her to be a decidedly annoying character!
i agree w/jaison 100%…i liked the book. i think ellen’s situation could happen to alot of ppl who have unresolved feelings for someone, always wondering “what if”…and then to find out the ex actually tried to apologize but was told to back off by her best friend/future sister in-law just added to the what ifs…i think it was great that she was able to realize for herself that he really wasnt the right person for in the end vs. always having that nagging unknowing feeling…also making her remember/reflect on why she loved andy…adding to that love..mushy but ttue, lol